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Thread: Not a new bike thread as such...

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    Default Not a new bike thread as such...

    The Gospel of Beancounter about Lazarus restored to life numerous times by Maccecht.

    As many know and much to Maccecht's puzzlement, I'm an ardent fan of TDM850s. Using my first TDM to cover nearly 140k miles, it was a relationship borne out of necessity rather than love, punctuated with buying shares in OPEC, an engine failure due to over-heating and numerous mishaps (including one disgraceful high side into a bush) - barring the oil consumption, everything was user error...

    That bike endured a lot but besides running out of fuel or a puncture never left me stranded - not even the reknowned wet weather misfire required a tow truck.

    Unfortunately, she was written off in May 2010 through a 5mph shunt.

    Enter TDM number 2 in late May 2010. Bought from a member of the TDM owners club, a priest no less. The bike had only 24k miles on the clock, looked very clean, sounded great, had full Givi luggage and service history too. I was chuffed at the price I paid and looked forward to continuing happy TDM ownership. Little did I know that the holy water had been drained from the radiator and replaced with something from a third world well...

    I picked it up the next day, rode 70 miles home and immediately taped up the ignition coils so as to not suffer the wet weather misfire and set about swapping the good bits of TDM 1 for the bad bits of TDM 2.

    We didn't gel at all at first and I wasn't keen on any riding besides commuting or on motorways. I put this down to me getting to know a new bike.

    The first tow truck of the relationship was Oct 2010 whilst on the way to TRC camping. After a quick stop off at Oxford services, the battery in the alarm fob decided it had had enough. At the time this seems to be a blessing in disguise as the heavens soon opened but I was sound asleep in the back of the tow truck. Not really the bike's fault I guess.

    Incident number two Feb 2011 and was a corroded lower shock mounting bolt. This caused the lower mount for the shock to shear off completely. It took Maccecht an hour with a ratchet gun and blow torch just to get the nut off of the bolt and another hour with a blow torch and a hammer to get the bolt out. That evening I was able to ride the bike home with a shiny new shock.

    Incident number three - April 2011, a burned out exhaust valve. Again, without the help of Maccecht I'd have been royally fucked. As it is, it only cost me 40 for some new exhaust valves and head gasket.

    At this point we realised the service history was a load of bollocks.

    Incidents four, five, six - Jul/Aug 2011, a Wales trip with Adam, Funners et al. Wet weather misfire. If I let the bike stand for 15 minutes it would start again without trouble but any time you slowed for a junction you'd have to keep the revs up. We replaced the coils and all seemed well.

    Incident seven - riding home from OB's Dec 2011 and the misfire reappears. Bike had to be recovered though as Green Flag had lost my details I had to pay for the call out and could only get carried 20 miles so the bike had to be left with a friend.

    March 2012 - we finally traced the misfire to a crack in the insulation of one of the spade connectors and only saw this by running a hose over the bike and 'inducing' the problem. We'd tried this before but had never been successful.

    Incident eight - April 2012, the Datatool alarm decides on early retirment. Thankfully the bike was already at Maccecht's. Despite having never touched an alarm before, I awoke one morning to a text telling me my bike was running.

    'Incident' nine - June 2012, preparation for our trip to Scotland later that month - service the bikes and I also wanted to replace the fork oil. Turns out the right hand fork leg didn't have any oil to replace. Guess that's why the handling was so bad (I thought it was all in my head up till that point.)

    A cracking trip around Scotland in the worst of weathers was had. No misfire and the bike ran sweetly. I did have to get a tow home due to water in my fuel but that was from a didgy fill up at Stirling services. Saved me paying for petrol all the way home and I got to sleep for the boring motorway but the trip overall did a lot to repay my faith in the bike.

    Since then ownership has been good (touch wood). We got through last winter without so much as a dead battery. The bike has needed tinkering but the most expensive part (besides tyres) has been new ignition coils at 20 for the pair.

    The bike has had numerous re-births, hence calling it Lazarus. This weekend though was the culmination of an almost three year courtship. I was lucky to get a second set of good bodywork, including fuel tank, for 180 and Maccecht was good enough to let me have a go with his spray gun. Four weekends and a lot of overspray later, the bike has gone from this:


    TDM850_Original.jpg


    To looking like this:

    20130518_Front_Left1.jpg20130518_Front_Right1.jpg
    The paint job isn't perfect but is miles better than what went before. Turd polished and rolled in glitter. The bike does feel new to me and fingers crossed it will be as reliable and fun to own its predecessor and I'm chuffed to bits with it.

    I owe Maccecht more than I can repay. Without his patience, generosity and friendship Lazarus would have been thrown into the Thames years ago.

    In my haste to get the thread posted I completely forgot to say thanks to the TDM owners club too for their support and guidance on the nuances of TDMs - Wicky, Studley and Dappers especially, thanks guys.

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    Last edited by Beancounter; 19-05-13 at 21:47.
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  3. #2
    Holy Sheet Savio Du Funk's Avatar
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    Default Re: Not a new bike thread as such...

    the schadenfreude in me enjoyed reading that very much, and then I remembered I own a Buell. A Buell that has cost me no less than 1449.50 in the last 3 weeks in various bills. I'm skint. Seriously.


    I once fired (well, performance managed that led to being fired) a chap called Lazarus. He was fucking useless and a liability and would lie (caught him asleep at his post, he told me he was researching narcolepsy as a live study...)

    Maccecht is a legend and, like Weeksy (and Crust) , goes out of his way to be helpful to other bikers. A real gent and I owe him for some shed time with a favourite TL of old.
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    Default Re: Not a new bike thread as such...

    Well we need to know the denomination of the priest.

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    Default Re: Not a new bike thread as such...

    Quote Originally Posted by Savio Du Funk View Post
    the schadenfreude in me enjoyed reading that very much, and then I remembered I own a Buell. A Buell that has cost me no less than 1449.50 in the last 3 weeks in various bills. I'm skint. Seriously.
    Ouch, and that just proves there is always someone worse off - costs for my repairs over the three years (including train fares, breakdown recovery) are nowhere near 1,400 - due of course to Maccecht.

    Quote Originally Posted by Savio Du Funk
    Maccecht is a legend and, like Weeksy (and Crust) , goes out of his way to be helpful to other bikers. A real gent and I owe him for some shed time with a favourite TL of old.
    Aye, Weeksy has been very quick to offer me help in the past. Had circs been different I might have been able to take him up on his kind offer.

    Quote Originally Posted by katana View Post
    Well we need to know the denomination of the priest.
    No idea. He wore a dog collar, had loads of crucifixes hanging on the walls of his house and garage and a few bibles strewn around the place. It could all have been for show but I doubt it.

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    Should Get Out More DefTrap's Avatar
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    Default Re: Not a new bike thread as such...

    Nice story.

    Shoulda bought a Homda - then we could do over the likes of helpful bastards like Maccecht and take his wallet.

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    Default Re: Not a new bike thread as such...

    I was looking at a Tedium 900 in J&S the otherday.... I could see other bikers laughing at me so I quickly walked over to a nearby R1 and admired that instead.

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    Default Re: Not a new bike thread as such...

    Quote Originally Posted by Beancounter View Post
    No idea. He wore a dog collar, had loads of crucifixes hanging on the walls of his house and garage and a few bibles strewn around the place. It could all have been for show but I doubt it.
    Fetishist / roleplay party host
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    Default Re: Not a new bike thread as such...

    Quote Originally Posted by Beancounter View Post
    No idea. He wore a dog collar, had loads of crucifixes hanging on the walls of his house and garage and a few bibles strewn around the place. It could all have been for show but I doubt it.
    Quote Originally Posted by Mad Ax View Post
    Fetishist / roleplay party host
    Or a kiddy fiddler with poor choice in disguises?
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    Default Re: Not a new bike thread as such...

    Quote Originally Posted by KungFooBob View Post
    I was looking at a Tedium 900 in J&S the otherday.... I could see other bikers laughing at me so I quickly walked over to a nearby R1 and admired that instead.
    Pretty sure they'd have been laughing at you regardless of the TDM.

    Quote Originally Posted by Mad Ax View Post
    Fetishist / roleplay party host
    Quote Originally Posted by The Martian View Post
    Or a kiddy fiddler with poor choice in disguises?
    I guess either of the above are possible. I'll choose to remain naive.

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